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Marriage - Miscommunication... Root Cause Of Problems?
By Mickaël Kerenterff, Sat Dec 10th
People of two opposing ideas can stir up arguments and fights.It's that situation when one thinks he has the right conceptwhile the other one also believes he has the proper notion. Bothof them would try to outsmart each other until one claimsvictory. Here's an actual example. My spouse would sometimes buy me signature clothing. When my Momfounds out how much it costs, she would advise us to budget ourmoney and just buy the affordable ones.
A problem occurs when my spouse thinks that her effort to giveme the best was unappreciated. Mom, on the other hand, wouldthink that my spouse is such a spender. There's a conflict with their beliefs. No two people are exactlyalike. We are totally unique; not only physically, but mentallyand emotionally as well. There will be many times when your opinion will not correspondwith that of another. So how can people prevent this kind ofconflict from occurring? Communication is the key to overcome doubts andmisunderstandings. You should let other people know what's in your mind. Don't keepthem guessing. There was a story about two couples who were filing a divorce.After the lawyer have spoken to them both, he found out that theroot cause of all their problems was due to miscommunication. Here's one of the couple's problems. The man filing the said that he just hated the breakfastmeal that his wife often prepared for him. On the other hand,the wife said that she's only preparing the meal because shethought it was her husband's favorite. But she never likedcooking it because it's very difficult to prepare. See? If only one of them took the initiative to speak out what'sin
his or her mind, then that particular dilemma would be over. Now why would people prefer to keep their complaints andcriticisms to themselves? What's holding them back? It's because they do not want to be rejected. Most, people, ifnot all, would like to be accepted and to be perceived aslikeable in the eyes of others. So can you get your message across without hurting theirfeelings? Substitute negative statements with positive ones. Instead of saying "You don't understand," say "Let me explain."Instead of remarking "You're wrong," say "Permit me to clarify."Instead of stating "You failed to say," just mention "Perhapsthis was not stated." There are certain words that affect a person more negatively incomparison with other words that have the same meaning. Nothing could be more pleasing to the ear than hearing someoneelse say that you are right. In this case, be prepared to letother people know that you respect their opinions. You may addyour comments at the end, but acknowledge them first. Say: You're right, although ... Great suggestion, however ... I agreewith your opinion, however ... I would feel the same way if Iwere you, although ... I understand your situation, however ... Reassure your counterparts that the decision made will benefitboth parties. People need to feel that they have made the rightchoice. Communication is a gift. Use it wisely for everyone's advantage. About the author:Author: Mickaël Kerenterff. For more information, please visitmy website at http://www.SuccessfulMarriageSecretsRevealed.comwhere you can grab a free e-course about Successful MarriageSecrets. You will Discover How Mary & John Easily TransformedTheir Miserable and Lifeless Marriage Relationship into OneFilled With LOVE, Happiness, and Excitement!
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