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How To Get To Know A Disabled Person
By Stephen Michael Kerr, Fri Dec 9th
When you first meet someone who is blind, deaf, or in awheelchair, what is your initial reaction? Curiosity? Sympathy?Awkwardness? If you experience any of these emotions, you arenot alone. Chances are you don't regularly associate withsomeone who is disabled, so these feelings are quite common. Having been blind since birth, I have encountered a wide rangeof reactions, from curious stares when i walk down the streetwith a cane or holding someone's arm, to amazement at being ableto feed and dress myself. Most people don't intend to be rude orinsensitive, but just aren't sure what to expect. Here are fourpoints to keep in mind if you should happen to meet a disabledperson. 1. Disabled people can lead active lives. With few exceptions, adisability does not prevent someone from working, raising afamily, or taking part in social activities. Many sports andrecreation programs have been adapted to accommodate a personwith a disability, including baseball, golf, water skiing,biking, and swimming. Instead of concentrating on thedisability, look at the person the same way you would any otheracquaintance.
2. It's all right to ask questions. Many people are afraid ofoffending someone by asking about their disability. When meetinganyone for the first time, it's natural to be curious about whothey are, where they're from, and what they do for a living. The same is true for a disabled person. Asking questions isusually acceptable, as long as you use common sense. Don't, forexample, ask a blind person how he feeds and bathes himself.Instead, find out
what equipment or techniques he uses in hisjob and at home, how he gets around town, how does Braille work,etc. 3. Offer assistance when necessary. You see a woman in awheelchair having trouble entering a building or negotiatingsteps. You'd like to help, but don't want to embarrass her. Whatshould you do? It's usually appropriate to lend a hand if someone is havingobvious difficulty, but keep in mind that not everyone will bewilling to accept your help. It's not much different thanpulling over and offering assistance to a motorist with a flattire. Unless the woman in the wheelchair is in danger, it isn'tnecessary to press the issue if they refuse your help. You didyour part. 4. Remember that we all have obstacles to overcome. No matterwho we are, each of us has a weakness or challenge to face. Howdo you feel when you are treated differently for being bald,short, or heavyset? Like you, a disabled person would muchrather be accepted for who they are, rather than be pitied orshunned because of a disability. Many friends and colleagueshave said to me, "I often forget that you are blind." To me,that is the ultimate compliment. Meeting someone with a disability doesn't have to be anintimidating experience. Asking questions, offering assistance,and putting yourself in their shoes can go a long way towardrecognizing them as people with normal thoughts and feelings whojust happen to have a disability. Who knows? You might make somenew friends in the process. About the author:Stephen Michael Kerr is the publisher of Adaptive Sports &Recreation, a free ezine devoted to sports for people withdisabilities. To read previous issues, visit:http://archives.zinester.com/41809
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